Its my birthday and I'll cry if I want to

I am writing this post in advance, I will still post it on Sunday, but as it's my birthday I will be with my family and have 1 or 6 glasses of wine inside me.
So today is D day or should I say B day. Yes it's my birthday and I have been dreading this day for ages. 3,0, two little numbers when put together are a big number or old number I should say. You hear of people growing old gracefully and although I respect them, I don't want to grow old gracefully or disgracefully, I just don't want to grow old. I want to be Peter Pan or Patricia Pan as I am female. I feel as though my 20's have shot by so quickly, it's not fair I want to be 21 yr old again but realistically it's never going to happen, unless a special juice is made that can make you 10 years younger (if you do hear of something like that, please let me know). 

The way my life is at the moment I do know that my 30's will be happier than my 20's, I was a very very wild child and I then extended it to my early 20's, believe me I had enough wild times for me plus a lot of other people. Things have now settled in my life, I am close to all my family (not always the case), I have a great 14yr old stepson and have been with my partner 8 years, so life is good, I just wish I had the knowledge I have now when I was 20. So now I am a member of the 30's club joining Kate Middleton and Kelly Clarkson, I wonder if they felt like this when they hit the big 30? I can't keep moaning though, nothing I say or do is going to change the fact I am 30, I just need to invest in fantastic beauty products and watch my wrinkles (closely).


I am lucky though, I am having a great dinner with my family and will be having plenty of wine, and although it's a cliché I do feel older and wiser, hopefully I can make my 30's the new 20's.
Then again I do see other bloggers/women who are in their 30's and they look amazing, so that may be me. Just give me 6 months to get used to being 30.